Recently watched the Thamizh movie 3BHK (3 Bedrooms, Hall, and Kitchen Apartment), which tells the story of Vasudevan (Vasu), a lower-middle-class father in India, and his relentless pursuit of owning a 3BHK apartment. His dream spans two decades, during which his entire family—his wife, son, and daughter—sacrifice their own aspirations to help him achieve it.
Yet, every time they near their goal, life intervenes: Prabhu, their under-performing son, requires a hefty capitation fee for engineering admission; their daughter Aarthi’s marriage demands financial resources; and Vasu suffers a cardiac arrest, adding medical bills to their burdens. The cycle repeats with cruel predictability.
Prabhu’s Struggle: A Dream Deferred
Prabhu, though not academically brilliant, dreams of becoming a Mechanical Engineer. However, with low marks, his only option is a private college that demands an exorbitant capitation fee. His aspirations are crushed when the principal declares, “The future is in IT—better take IT.” Pressured by Vasu, Prabhu reluctantly pursues IT engineering while working part-time at a machine shop—his true passion.
After struggling through his degree, he lands a programming job but finds no joy in it. When Vasu arranges his marriage to a wealthy man’s daughter (for financial security,) Prabhu rebels and on the eve of his engagement, he elopes with his school sweetheart, declaring, “This is the first decision I’ve made with my heart!”
His IT career ends abruptly when his manager dismisses him: “You just Ctrl C & Ctrl V code. Nothing great!”—a harsh truth about India’s IT sector. He declares, “IT has its future, but my future is not in IT!” Finally free, Prabhu returns to his passion, working at the machine shop and pursuing Mechanical Engineering degree with his earnings and eventually securing a well-paying mechanical engineering job.
Aarthi’s Sacrifice: The Cost of Conformity
Aarthi, on the other hand, earns a commerce degree and secures a good job – only to be married off after a five-minute meeting, a common tragedy in middle-class Indian families. Forced to quit her job by her in-laws, she becomes a domestic servant in her in-laws’ home, enduring abuse until she finally walks out and files for divorce. Returning to work becomes her solace.
The Bittersweet Fulfillment of a Dream
In the end, Aarthi and Prabhu secure a housing loan and buy the long-coveted 3BHK apartment. The family moves in, but at what cost?
The film poignantly portrays a father living his dreams through his children, dictating what their dreams should be. The mother, a silent spectator, embodies the passive compliance often seen in traditional Indian households.
A Lesson for Parents: Let Children Dream
Parents should never live vicariously through their children. Instead, they must encourage their children to dream – and dream big. Their role is to support the children in achieving their dreams, not dictate what they should dream.
REJINCES 